85 Seconds: The Story of a (Quitting) Marathoner
THE STARTING LINE
Why did I start running? About 12 years ago, a cardiologist told me that he was sick of being a doctor...
No, that's not what happened.
About 12 years ago, I started feeling dizzy at a club in downtown Atlanta. It was my freshman year at Morehouse College, and I did what you do down that way, around that time: I took a shuttle from Spelman's parking lot to the club. I rode an ambulance home. The cardiologist the next week told me I had Mitral Valve Prolapse - a heart condition that is sort of common but most folks that have it are asymptomatic. Stress, Cafeine, and Fatigue will make it show if you have it. (In other words, being in college...) So the cardiologist, who looked a LOT like Dr. Julius Hibbert, told me I'd never be able to run a marathon, which he said jokingly because I had never thought of running a marathon. In fact, his entire point was, "Listen, relax. As long as you don't want to run a marathon, you'll be fine throughout your life."
Well, I really wanted to run a marathon, and I'm too stubborn to follow anybody's directions, so I decided I would take it really SLOW (which is the advice I would give ANYONE considering long distance running). Run a 5K...that was my first goal. To do that, I wanted to be able to run 2 miles without stopping, no matter how long it took. That took 2 years.
In 2010, I ran a 5K in 30:29. Next I wanted to beat 30 minutes...
***the rest of this story is the tale of a man with a compulsive personality. People like to diagnose themselves with "disorders" all the time, when it's really just some stuff that you need to concentrate on and fix, but I am a compulsive-type***
I figured, If you can train for a half marathon, you can definitely run the sub-30 5K along the way. So I did both, and in 2011 ran the Chicago Half, in 2:23.
If I survived a half, all I had to do was pause and run the 2nd half, right? I set my sights on a marathon, knowing that it takes 16 weeks to train. I gave myself a year - long enough to ease my heart in. Thankfully I have never had to work on patience.
In 2012 I ran the Chicago Marathon in 5:01:24. It was grueling, and at Mile 21 I hit "The Wall", which may have actually been a brick wall. I ran injury-free, and my heart was in perfect shape. In fact, my doctor - who I saw about 4 times while training (just to be SURE) - said the week before the marathon: "I don't see any MVP at all. Your cardiologist may have been sick of being a doctor is all."
ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? 85 Seconds
Up to now, I remember the reasons I gave for running another marathon:
1. It's an excuse to travel and tour (by foot) great cities
2. I'll stay in shape
3. I can raise money for folks
ALL OF THESE can you do WITHOUT running a marathon :) The real reason is...I'm a compulsive, and aggressive with goals, so I wanted to run a sub-5 hour marathon. That's it. I'LL RUN ONE MORE MARATHON, 85 seconds faster than the last, and quit.
I chose the LA Marathon, March 2014 (a chance to see a great city!!!) and began training. I picked a program and stuck to it. The first race I focused on finishing, and the 2nd race I decided to focus on FUEL, since that's where I went wrong in 2012. I hydrated incredibly well, ate well, and then a lot of stuff happened.
-The worst winter in my lifetime happened. Training outside was deaded around January. Training on a treadmill is the worst.
-The day before the race was a mess, mentally. I was staying with family in Santa Monica, and didn't rest well.
-The day OF the race, well, LA TRAFFIC. The race starts at Dodger Stadium, which is on top of a winding road mountain. When the race was 10 minutes from starting, I was at the BOTTOM of that hill, jumped out of the car, and ran up the hill. I'd guess at least a mile, a good warmup, right? I jumped into the race JUST before they closed off the runners, at the very end of the line.
-It was the hottest day of the year in LA that day. 84 degrees. Not marathon weather. That was quit-a-marathon weather. No way. I'll run a little slower, stop at every water station.
***the good part is coming, trust me***
-Because of the poor fueling the day before, I needed to empty my insides during the race. Very unexpected, and because of a long line took me about 9 minutes to accomplish.
I finished the race though, heat cramps at Mile 17 and all. My final finish time?
5:01:24 - ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!? I was getting a post race massage when the news came, and I could have cried. I ran the EXACT SAME TIME AS THE FIRST MARATHON. About 30 seconds later, I decided I was running the Chicago Marathon later that year - that is, 5 days from now.
That's right - 2 marathons in a year - and I trained with abandon. I ran hard. I ate great. I added strength training to ward off cramps and add speed. I am, at this point, on pace to run a 4:20 marathon. That doesn't matter. I am only training for 85 seconds.
Then I am quitting...
The Finish Line
Running a marathon takes a lot out on you and your body (read this: "The Terrifying Hell a Marathon Inflicts on Your Body"), or the rumors about marathoners being more likely to have spider eggs in their ears (!). But the reason I am really quitting has nothing to do with that. I have run almost completely injury-free (shin splints a couple weeks ago...gone now). I won't need new hips or knees; I've never lost my nipples or any toenails; my heart feels great, and I am in the best shape of my life. I have no stomach, wake up full of natural energy, feel genuinely sharp, and have a deep appreciation for ideas like "endurance" and "seeing a thing through" - none of that was true before I began running. I am a better man because I began running.
But I also have a family. A wife and baby, and I spend anywhere from 6-10 hours a week running over 6 days. Times when my wife wanted to go for a morning run, I was already gone. Times when she needed a moment away from the baby, I needed to log miles. Times when I had 60 minutes between being at work and picking up the baby - times where I SHOULD have sat my butt down and caught a breath: I was running. The past 3 or 4 years of my life have been RUNNING, and between being the solo pastor of a growing church, finishing an album, raising a toddler, and doing everything I can to leave this world better than I found it...something has to give.
I can't run anymore marathons. For the sake of everything that means the most to me, a compulsive has to learn to slow down. To say no. To walk and not run. I already feel after I crush this 5-hour time that I'm gonna want to beat 4 hours. Maybe when the kids are older. A few albums down the line. When we hire an associate pastor. When the time is right.
A lot has been sacrificed for me to become a runner. I cannot thank God enough for the opportunity - it has changed my life. But now it's time for me to be home, to do some sacrificing of my own, to let some other folks run themselves crazy.
I hate running. I absolutely love running. And if you're a runner, you know exactly what I mean. There are few things I quit, but after Sunday, this is it.
85 seconds ain't worth a lifetime.